You. Yes, You. You’ll Do Just Fine.


It’s been some time, hasn’t it?

Did you think I’d gone?

Silly reader.

I’ve simply been getting things ready.

Oh, you didn’t think this blog was just here for your entertainment, did you?

It doesn’t do to be so trusting, not in this day and age. Someone hands you a silly poem about a dog, or some spurious writing advice, and you gobble it right down without checking for strychnine.

You didn’t follow the blue words, did you? Good. There may be hope for you yet.

But you’re still reading, aren’t you?

Perhaps I haven’t given you a fair chance to leave off. It’s only sporting, after all. All right, then. Off you pop. I’ll give you some nice blank space in which to do so. There’s probably nothing worth reading under all that anyway.







You don’t even want to keep reading, do you? It’s sheer stubbornness at this point. You’ve got to get to the end so you can tell all your friends what a load of tripe you’ve just had to wallow through.

That’s all right. You don’t need to enjoy the taste of the worm. You just need to bite down on the fishhook.

Haven’t you ever wondered why you read the things you do? Did you actually think you had a choice in the matter? Elsewise I imagine you attributed it to Psychology. Funny word, Psychology. Say it often enough, and people start to believe it exists.

No, I’m not going to tell you why I need everyone to read this. First of all, telling you would ruin everything. And secondly, it simply isn’t true. Just look at her. She stopped reading three paragraphs ago. Obviously, I didn’t need her to get to the finish. And that fellow closed the page as soon as he saw there weren’t any nude photographs.

No, I didn’t need any of them. The only one I needed to get to the end was…you. Who else was it going to be? Didn’t you notice everyone else slowly peeling away? It’s just you and me now. And I’ve nearly got what I need. Hold still; this won’t hurt a bit.

There. That wasn’t so bad, was it? That’s all. Back you go, on about your daily life. Best not to dwell on it. Cheer up. You probably won’t notice that anything’s changed.

No one ever does.

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